Well, I'm home. And so far I have stayed pretty busy. Up and out and doing things with people every day. I wish it would stay this way, but I have a feeling it will die down soon. So far I have visited with my friends that are still in high school, and I have painted my room and met my sisters best friend. I've been having a good time so far. But, I feel like something is missing.
I think I left some of myself back in Idaho. My new friends, my wonderful niece and nephew, my brother and his wonderful wife. I feel as if I am trying to fill that void with something else. That's why I want to stay busy. I'm afraid that if I don't do something all the time, I'll break down. I come close at night. Just laying in bed thinking about everything. It's not fun.
My friends in high school have tried convincing me to just go to Univ of Montevallo. Maybe that would be best. Leave my past in Idaho. Not have to worry about running into someone who will only bring up heartaches. But...
I don't know. I want to go back. But I'm scared. I'm scared I'll get homesick. I'm scared I'll run into him.. He pretty much hates me, and I'm still in love with him. I need to find someone that will cure me of that...
For now though, I will live one day at a time. Try to stay busy and not think too much, secretly wishing I could go back in time.
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