OK, that may be a bit exaggerated. But, let me tell you, I loved it.
Kaitlyn Minor and I went there for lunch today and it was very very enjoyable. I ordered this Chicken and Shrimp Carbenero stuff and I didn't want the shrimp, because I don't like fish. But when James (our server) brought it to me, it had shrimp:( He apologized profusely and even offered to bring me something else! But I declined because it smelled delicious. And it was! Except the shrimp. I almost threw up. But, I managed to just spit out the shrimp that was all chewed up in my mouth and keep what was in my stomach where it belongs, in my stomach. He asked if there was anything else he could get us and Kaitlyn said if he brought me chocolate, I'd be happy. So.. He did! He brought me chocolate mousse. OMG. So good. The manager in site came out and asked me about my lunch and what I didn't like and he even got Kaitlyn some mousse, even though her order wasn't messed up. The food was delicious. The service was awesome. And my friend just made it all the better. We had a great time catching up and talking and making new inside jokes. Even though I didn't like the shrimp, the rest of my dish was amazing. Heaven in my mouth. Fo' reals. I definitely recommend it! And, if you're ever in the area, go to the Olive Garden in Alabaster and ask for James. He was great! Quite possibly my new favorite restaurant!
Friday, April 22, 2011
2AM and Still No Sleep
It's almost 2 in the morning and I can't sleep. Strange, because I was always able to sleep before. In fact, I love sleep. So why, you ask, am I not asleep?
I have had a lot on my mind, as of late. And it's weighing me down.
I have to decide if I want to go back to Idaho, back to BYU-I. Back to a place where... I do not particularly want to be. Which is weird, right? If I don't actually want to be there, then why should my decision be so hard? It should be simple, yes? But no.. Because the REASON I don't want to be there is.... Selfish? Is that the right word? I don't want to be there because there are people there that will only cause me pain. And I don't think I'm strong enough for that. Not yet at least.
But, I feel like if I don't go back, I'll be giving up completely. Like saying "Here, you have Idaho. You win." And.. Well, he doesn't win. I loved being out there. I loved my roommates. I loved my teachers. I loved the campus. I hated to cold, but got used to it.. Somewhat. I don't want to give all of that up because I'm weak. I need to be there. I want to be there. But I don't want to be there. I'm afraid it might hurt. I KNOW it will hurt, for a while at least. It did when I came home, for so many reasons, but it did. I just.. So many emotions. I have to make my decision soon tho. To go, or not to go. That is the question. LOL
So here I am. At 2AM. Pondering over this, and something else that is entirely to personal for me to blog about.
A wise friend once said that she takes her problems to the Lord. I'm doing that. But sometimes it's nice to write it all down just do get it out.. You know?
Well, maybe Robin Hood will put me to sleep. Farewell!
I have had a lot on my mind, as of late. And it's weighing me down.
I have to decide if I want to go back to Idaho, back to BYU-I. Back to a place where... I do not particularly want to be. Which is weird, right? If I don't actually want to be there, then why should my decision be so hard? It should be simple, yes? But no.. Because the REASON I don't want to be there is.... Selfish? Is that the right word? I don't want to be there because there are people there that will only cause me pain. And I don't think I'm strong enough for that. Not yet at least.
But, I feel like if I don't go back, I'll be giving up completely. Like saying "Here, you have Idaho. You win." And.. Well, he doesn't win. I loved being out there. I loved my roommates. I loved my teachers. I loved the campus. I hated to cold, but got used to it.. Somewhat. I don't want to give all of that up because I'm weak. I need to be there. I want to be there. But I don't want to be there. I'm afraid it might hurt. I KNOW it will hurt, for a while at least. It did when I came home, for so many reasons, but it did. I just.. So many emotions. I have to make my decision soon tho. To go, or not to go. That is the question. LOL
So here I am. At 2AM. Pondering over this, and something else that is entirely to personal for me to blog about.
A wise friend once said that she takes her problems to the Lord. I'm doing that. But sometimes it's nice to write it all down just do get it out.. You know?
Well, maybe Robin Hood will put me to sleep. Farewell!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
At a Crossroads..
Well, I just sent in my application for the University of Montevallo.
I figure, I need to know where I'm going, and if I decide to stay in state this summer, I need a school to attend. So, a few people have been bugging me to go there, so I sent in my application.
I feel like I've given up on ever returning to Idaho..
I haven't. I really haven't. I'm just not sure where I'll be when school comes around, and I'm not sure if Idaho is where I should be, not anymore.
I don't want people to think that I'm giving up on Idaho. I'm just not sure if I can return there and not have issues. I might run into certain people that I'm not quite prepared to meet. I'm not sure if I can handle that, not now at least, and I don't know about in five months..
So, University of Montevallo is my Plan B. If I get accepted and I feel it's right, then I'll go there.. But, for now, no promises. I still have no idea what I want to do. But, like I said before. I'm taking a jump. And hopefully that jump will land me in the right waters..
I figure, I need to know where I'm going, and if I decide to stay in state this summer, I need a school to attend. So, a few people have been bugging me to go there, so I sent in my application.
I feel like I've given up on ever returning to Idaho..
I haven't. I really haven't. I'm just not sure where I'll be when school comes around, and I'm not sure if Idaho is where I should be, not anymore.
I don't want people to think that I'm giving up on Idaho. I'm just not sure if I can return there and not have issues. I might run into certain people that I'm not quite prepared to meet. I'm not sure if I can handle that, not now at least, and I don't know about in five months..
So, University of Montevallo is my Plan B. If I get accepted and I feel it's right, then I'll go there.. But, for now, no promises. I still have no idea what I want to do. But, like I said before. I'm taking a jump. And hopefully that jump will land me in the right waters..
Thursday, April 14, 2011
The Cliffs of Life
Today has been the greatest day of the week. I went with my dear friends Jenn, Britt, and Thom to a place up past Gadsden to..... CLIFF DIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Whew! It was sooo incredibly amazing!! So fun on so many levels! Literally!
At first, we had to climg over and across some rocks just to get to a decent cliff and that was scary, I'll tell you what! There was one rock we had to climb up on that was over 6 feet tall! That was scary because on either side was a stright drop into rocky waters. But, we did it! And then, once we got to the ledge, that's when the real fun started.
Now, I have this rational fear of falling. Not so much landing, or heights, though height has to do with my fear, falling is what kills me. The weightlessness you feel as you leave solid ground and the rush you get when your stomach jumps into your heart. Wow. It's incredible, and yet terrifying all at once!
And then there is the heigth. See, I'm not afraid of heights when I know I run no risk of falling. But, put me close to an edge of something higher up that 10 feet and I want to die. However, if I were somewhere, like say the Grand Canyon, I'd be fine. Because for some reason, I know I'm safe, It's strange, I know.
But I love thrill as well. So, asking me to jump off of a 50-some foot cliff into ICE COLD water, and I'm all for it... Till we get to the cliff. Then I pussy-foot around for ten minutes.
But today, today I took that plunge into the great unknown (OK, maybe not so great and unknown, but still) and let me tell you, it was so exhilirating. Not knowing where you'll land or when. Just trusting that the air rushing past your ears and through your hair means you're going down, and that you'll be there soon. It's awe inspiring.
The water was so cold when I landed. It about took my breath away. I couldn't hardly swim! But, I loved it! I loved jumping! It was so fun! And once I finally got out of the water, I warmed up and, even though I didn't want to do it again, I was proud of myself for jumping and beating my fear.
This experience, this fun filled day, has taught me a lot. I know I've mentioned once or twice a friend that I don't know where I'm going, or what I want to do with myself anymore. That my life is in pieces and I don't know how to put it back together. But, I've realized that I don't have to know WHERE to start, I jsut have to start. I don't have to know where this will lead me (right now anyways), I just have to make a desicion, because right now, I'm standing on the edge of the cliff. And I need to make the jump. The jump that will start a new life for me. I'm not sure about hings as I once was, and that scares me. But, I don't have to be sure about everything. I just have to make decisions that will help me get to where I KNOW I want to be: with my Heavenly Father. So, for now, I'll take the first jump. I'll do something that will hopefully put me on the path I need to be. And when the next cliff arrives, I'll jump that one. And I'll keep jumping and jumping. And hopefully, I'll get where I need to be.
Whew! It was sooo incredibly amazing!! So fun on so many levels! Literally!
At first, we had to climg over and across some rocks just to get to a decent cliff and that was scary, I'll tell you what! There was one rock we had to climb up on that was over 6 feet tall! That was scary because on either side was a stright drop into rocky waters. But, we did it! And then, once we got to the ledge, that's when the real fun started.
Now, I have this rational fear of falling. Not so much landing, or heights, though height has to do with my fear, falling is what kills me. The weightlessness you feel as you leave solid ground and the rush you get when your stomach jumps into your heart. Wow. It's incredible, and yet terrifying all at once!
And then there is the heigth. See, I'm not afraid of heights when I know I run no risk of falling. But, put me close to an edge of something higher up that 10 feet and I want to die. However, if I were somewhere, like say the Grand Canyon, I'd be fine. Because for some reason, I know I'm safe, It's strange, I know.
But I love thrill as well. So, asking me to jump off of a 50-some foot cliff into ICE COLD water, and I'm all for it... Till we get to the cliff. Then I pussy-foot around for ten minutes.
But today, today I took that plunge into the great unknown (OK, maybe not so great and unknown, but still) and let me tell you, it was so exhilirating. Not knowing where you'll land or when. Just trusting that the air rushing past your ears and through your hair means you're going down, and that you'll be there soon. It's awe inspiring.
The water was so cold when I landed. It about took my breath away. I couldn't hardly swim! But, I loved it! I loved jumping! It was so fun! And once I finally got out of the water, I warmed up and, even though I didn't want to do it again, I was proud of myself for jumping and beating my fear.
This experience, this fun filled day, has taught me a lot. I know I've mentioned once or twice a friend that I don't know where I'm going, or what I want to do with myself anymore. That my life is in pieces and I don't know how to put it back together. But, I've realized that I don't have to know WHERE to start, I jsut have to start. I don't have to know where this will lead me (right now anyways), I just have to make a desicion, because right now, I'm standing on the edge of the cliff. And I need to make the jump. The jump that will start a new life for me. I'm not sure about hings as I once was, and that scares me. But, I don't have to be sure about everything. I just have to make decisions that will help me get to where I KNOW I want to be: with my Heavenly Father. So, for now, I'll take the first jump. I'll do something that will hopefully put me on the path I need to be. And when the next cliff arrives, I'll jump that one. And I'll keep jumping and jumping. And hopefully, I'll get where I need to be.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
I don't know what to say..
I've written this post about three times now, and I have no idea what to say. I've changed the topic so many times. And I still don't know what to say.. There is so much on my mind right now.
I'm missing an old friend. She was someone I looked up to, and I admit, I stalked her blog to see how she is doing. I was happy to find she is great. That brings me great joy. I miss her. I miss our talks. Her advice. She would know what to tell me right now, if I could just talk to her. But, our friendship is gone. Maybe some time in the future, I can talk to her again. But for now, I've accepted our fate. Our paths are not meant to cross anymore, even though they were so enter twined before. All I can do now is read her blog, and know that she is doing well. That's way more than I could ever ask for.
I also just got done watching a movie. it's called Joseph Smith: Prophet of the Restoration. It's my all time favorite movie. Every time I watch it, I'm reassured that this is the true church. That bro. Joseph really is a man called of God, and those prophets that followed are, too. It baffles me that people don't see it. I admit, sometime my vision is foggy, but, when I think about the hell he went through, and his faith, my sight is cleared. His place beside the throne of God was made sure the minute he died for God's cause. For this sweet, sweet gospel. No other person can testify of the truthfulness of this church, than him. And for that, I'm thankful.
The gospel has been such a blessing in my life. I'm so grateful for it. Without it, I would be a very different person. I wouldn't have the love and friendship I do now. I wouldn't know the people I know and have the experiences I have. I'm not perfect, but that's the thing, isn't it. You don't have to be. You just have to try to be perfect, and that's all we can do. The gospel allows for repentance and forgiveness. I've had to use the Atonement so many times in my short life. But that's what it's there for. To use and use and use. Without it, I would never be able to see my Father again. And boy, do I miss Him. I miss Him like no other. Which is weird, cause I don't remember Him. I just know He loves me. And I can feel His love through this gospel. You couldn't ask for anything more than that. To know and feel His arms around you, in every moment of your life. Knowing that He misses you, and wants to see you again and take you in His arms and have you home again, it's just so over whelming.
Sometimes I feel like I'll never get there again. And that just kills me. It would be like me moving out of the house and then never being able to see my parents again. I went six months like that and by the end of it, I couldn't have been more happy to be home. So, everyday, I do my best to do the things that will help me return to my Father's kingdom. To hug Him and hear Him say "Welcome home, my daughter."
I know this gospel will take me there. And I'm going to do everything I can to get there.
I'm missing an old friend. She was someone I looked up to, and I admit, I stalked her blog to see how she is doing. I was happy to find she is great. That brings me great joy. I miss her. I miss our talks. Her advice. She would know what to tell me right now, if I could just talk to her. But, our friendship is gone. Maybe some time in the future, I can talk to her again. But for now, I've accepted our fate. Our paths are not meant to cross anymore, even though they were so enter twined before. All I can do now is read her blog, and know that she is doing well. That's way more than I could ever ask for.
I also just got done watching a movie. it's called Joseph Smith: Prophet of the Restoration. It's my all time favorite movie. Every time I watch it, I'm reassured that this is the true church. That bro. Joseph really is a man called of God, and those prophets that followed are, too. It baffles me that people don't see it. I admit, sometime my vision is foggy, but, when I think about the hell he went through, and his faith, my sight is cleared. His place beside the throne of God was made sure the minute he died for God's cause. For this sweet, sweet gospel. No other person can testify of the truthfulness of this church, than him. And for that, I'm thankful.
The gospel has been such a blessing in my life. I'm so grateful for it. Without it, I would be a very different person. I wouldn't have the love and friendship I do now. I wouldn't know the people I know and have the experiences I have. I'm not perfect, but that's the thing, isn't it. You don't have to be. You just have to try to be perfect, and that's all we can do. The gospel allows for repentance and forgiveness. I've had to use the Atonement so many times in my short life. But that's what it's there for. To use and use and use. Without it, I would never be able to see my Father again. And boy, do I miss Him. I miss Him like no other. Which is weird, cause I don't remember Him. I just know He loves me. And I can feel His love through this gospel. You couldn't ask for anything more than that. To know and feel His arms around you, in every moment of your life. Knowing that He misses you, and wants to see you again and take you in His arms and have you home again, it's just so over whelming.
Sometimes I feel like I'll never get there again. And that just kills me. It would be like me moving out of the house and then never being able to see my parents again. I went six months like that and by the end of it, I couldn't have been more happy to be home. So, everyday, I do my best to do the things that will help me return to my Father's kingdom. To hug Him and hear Him say "Welcome home, my daughter."
I know this gospel will take me there. And I'm going to do everything I can to get there.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Sand, Sweat, Sun
I'm sitting at home on Friday bored out of my mind, trying to think of what I can do that night to entertain myself when suddenly, Meredith Woods text me saying that her and Lauren wanted to get a bunch of Lily's friends to come surprise her at the beach this weekend. Yes!! Finally, a reprieve from my mundane life! Nathan then texts me and says that he is going to go down, if I wanted a ride. Things were working out great! So, Skylar and I go to the store to get a few things and then back home to pack. Nathan come and got us, and then we were on the road trip. It was quite the trip. So fun.I really got to know Nathan during that drive. It was totally fun.
Finally we arrive at Perdido Key, FL. Lauren's cousin has a condo out there that they were staying at and they had tons of room, so we stayed there, too. It was gorgeous! We surprised Lily with a song and some cup cakes, then we headed down to the beach for a midnight walk and to crab. Apparently, when you crab, you hunt for crabs, and then you put them in the same bucket and watch them fight. Kinda inhumane, but highly entertaining. We only were able to find one crab, so we let him go with a promise to come back the next night and try again.
Finally, we all crawl into bed at 3. I actually couldn't believe I was there, so I thought I was going to wake up back here in Calera. But, I didn't! I woke up in Florida! Haha, it was 7:30. The earliest I had been awake in weeks. We all got up and headed down to the beach for a few hours before General Conference started. I laid out and caught some rays. It felt great. And when I got hot, I just took a dip in the ocean. Man! it was great!
When it was time for conference, we headed back to eat and listen to it. It was kinda sketchy because the internet was bad, so the video kept skipping. But once it was over, we hopped back in the car and headed back to the beach! The weather by then had warmed up and gotten a bit breezier, but it was still awesome.
A couple of us decided to just stay at the beach instead of going back to watch conference, simply because we would just fall asleep and wanted to nap at the beach instead. As we were snoozing, Jacob started to dig to China. LOL. A couple people would come a comment but my favorite would have to be the little kid who came over and asked Jake if he could cuddle with Jake in the hole. This kid was on some sort of drug, Jake could see his hospital bracelet and his arm was in a cast. But it was just hilarious to listen to their conversation. The poor kid probably had no idea what he was saying. He seemed to think that Alabama was in Russia. Strange. But, finally he left and Jake was done with the hole. So, I volunteered to get buried! It was quite the experience. The sand felt nice because it was cool, but after a while it started to get heavy and it became hard to breath. So, Jake dug me out, and I took a dip in the water to rinse off as much as I could before we went home for dinner. But, I can finally say I've been buried and I can now bury others. Haha
We went to dinner at this place called the Crab Trap. Just some seafood place. But since I don't like seafood, I ordered a hamburger. Original, I know. But hey, it's okay to not like seafood. At least, that's what the menu said. Afterwards, some of the guys wanted to go to the priesthood session at the local chapel, so the rest of us drove in to Pensacola, thinking we were gonna walk to strip. Instead, we went to an ice cream place similar to Cold Stone called The Marble Slab. The ice cream was delicious. The ride was hilarious. Rachel Dean and the BEST laugh ever. It's so contagious and spontaneous. I love it! Next, we went to Gulf Shores in search for souvenir shops so that Nathan could get a t-shirt as proof he was there. Finally, we headed back to the room and most of us were dead. So, we cleaned up a bit, and then the guys, minus Jared, and Lily went crabbing again. I was in bed by midnight. It was great.
Sunday we woke up early, cleaned the condo in preparation to leave, and then we headed back to the beach one last time. We were there for about an hour, and then we went to get some food from this pizza place next to where we were. Then we went to this place called the Happy Shack. The sign in the front says "Walk in for a free hug", Wow. Yeah. It really said that. I managed to walk out with a small brown bag. Haha. Not suspicious at all, I'd say.
I rode home with Meredith, Lily, and Lauren. Meredith drives just like me. Fast and impatient. We tried listening to conference, but it kept buffering, so instead I took a nap. The ride back was pretty chill. We went straight to Lauren's to drop her off and then to Lily's to pick up her brother and then off to FHE. We were a bit early, so we just ate the rolls left over from the Bozeman's lunch and chilled. I was soo beat by then though. And my skin was starting to get hot from being sun burned.
We discussed the talks given during conference, and then played some games. It was a pretty relaxing night. Nothing special. But still fun. The second I got home, I checked my Facebook and emails, and then hit the pillows. I was out by midnight. It was soo nice to sleep in, but disappointing not to wake up to sounds of the ocean. But, I guess I'll live.
I'm definitely going to go back this summer. Take Brianna with me before we head to the hell which is Rexburg. LOL
Finally we arrive at Perdido Key, FL. Lauren's cousin has a condo out there that they were staying at and they had tons of room, so we stayed there, too. It was gorgeous! We surprised Lily with a song and some cup cakes, then we headed down to the beach for a midnight walk and to crab. Apparently, when you crab, you hunt for crabs, and then you put them in the same bucket and watch them fight. Kinda inhumane, but highly entertaining. We only were able to find one crab, so we let him go with a promise to come back the next night and try again.
Finally, we all crawl into bed at 3. I actually couldn't believe I was there, so I thought I was going to wake up back here in Calera. But, I didn't! I woke up in Florida! Haha, it was 7:30. The earliest I had been awake in weeks. We all got up and headed down to the beach for a few hours before General Conference started. I laid out and caught some rays. It felt great. And when I got hot, I just took a dip in the ocean. Man! it was great!
When it was time for conference, we headed back to eat and listen to it. It was kinda sketchy because the internet was bad, so the video kept skipping. But once it was over, we hopped back in the car and headed back to the beach! The weather by then had warmed up and gotten a bit breezier, but it was still awesome.
A couple of us decided to just stay at the beach instead of going back to watch conference, simply because we would just fall asleep and wanted to nap at the beach instead. As we were snoozing, Jacob started to dig to China. LOL. A couple people would come a comment but my favorite would have to be the little kid who came over and asked Jake if he could cuddle with Jake in the hole. This kid was on some sort of drug, Jake could see his hospital bracelet and his arm was in a cast. But it was just hilarious to listen to their conversation. The poor kid probably had no idea what he was saying. He seemed to think that Alabama was in Russia. Strange. But, finally he left and Jake was done with the hole. So, I volunteered to get buried! It was quite the experience. The sand felt nice because it was cool, but after a while it started to get heavy and it became hard to breath. So, Jake dug me out, and I took a dip in the water to rinse off as much as I could before we went home for dinner. But, I can finally say I've been buried and I can now bury others. Haha
We went to dinner at this place called the Crab Trap. Just some seafood place. But since I don't like seafood, I ordered a hamburger. Original, I know. But hey, it's okay to not like seafood. At least, that's what the menu said. Afterwards, some of the guys wanted to go to the priesthood session at the local chapel, so the rest of us drove in to Pensacola, thinking we were gonna walk to strip. Instead, we went to an ice cream place similar to Cold Stone called The Marble Slab. The ice cream was delicious. The ride was hilarious. Rachel Dean and the BEST laugh ever. It's so contagious and spontaneous. I love it! Next, we went to Gulf Shores in search for souvenir shops so that Nathan could get a t-shirt as proof he was there. Finally, we headed back to the room and most of us were dead. So, we cleaned up a bit, and then the guys, minus Jared, and Lily went crabbing again. I was in bed by midnight. It was great.
Sunday we woke up early, cleaned the condo in preparation to leave, and then we headed back to the beach one last time. We were there for about an hour, and then we went to get some food from this pizza place next to where we were. Then we went to this place called the Happy Shack. The sign in the front says "Walk in for a free hug", Wow. Yeah. It really said that. I managed to walk out with a small brown bag. Haha. Not suspicious at all, I'd say.
I rode home with Meredith, Lily, and Lauren. Meredith drives just like me. Fast and impatient. We tried listening to conference, but it kept buffering, so instead I took a nap. The ride back was pretty chill. We went straight to Lauren's to drop her off and then to Lily's to pick up her brother and then off to FHE. We were a bit early, so we just ate the rolls left over from the Bozeman's lunch and chilled. I was soo beat by then though. And my skin was starting to get hot from being sun burned.
We discussed the talks given during conference, and then played some games. It was a pretty relaxing night. Nothing special. But still fun. The second I got home, I checked my Facebook and emails, and then hit the pillows. I was out by midnight. It was soo nice to sleep in, but disappointing not to wake up to sounds of the ocean. But, I guess I'll live.
I'm definitely going to go back this summer. Take Brianna with me before we head to the hell which is Rexburg. LOL
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